I have become THAT mother...

I think it's official - I have become THAT mother
the one I used to roll my eyes at
the one I claimed I would never become.

Which should teach me a lesson about being too judgmental!! But then my opinions and judgments getting me in trouble could probably be a whole book by itself.

When my oldest one was in preaschool, JJ's teacher used to send home "what we did today" slips every day. There would often be a note reminding parents they had forgotten to do x, y and z. I used think, "good grief, how hard is it to get that done" How naive I was - I am now THAT mom - the one who forgot it was her 8 year old's star of the week this year!!

Before I had kids I swore no kid would ever sleep with me - that lasted about 48 hours into parenting my first child. JJ was the perfect baby BUT he never slept. Now the rule is that when they turn five no more sleeping with me. Well it was until Jordan. Right now I would just as soon she come down and climb in bed with me halfway through the night so I am not us at 5am discovering what she has gotten into! Yes - I am THAT mom!

JJ and Bethany and Jessi never used to leave the house in clothes that didn't match or gasp - were on backwards or inside out. And no child could go to bed in pajamas that didn't match!!! Now as long as my kids have on clothes I am pretty much happy (and the pjs ?- half the time Jordan just puts on a new outfit of clothing :)). This is a combination of deciding that if they are wearing season appropriate clothing we are winning the battle, they are expressing their personality, and that I want to celebrate every victory with Jordan - if she picked out her own clothes and they are covering her body appropriately I am not going to squash her success by insisting on "fixing" it so her shirt is on frontwards and her pants are right side out and her shoes are on the right feet. I never understood the awesomeness of this acheivement before. And Jordan has designated herself to get Timothy's clothes for me every morning - which is actually one big sister job she can do!! So know when you see my kids less then perfectly put together - know that I have become THAT mom!

Some moms can tell you all the ins and outs and information about their kids therapies - I can tell you that Jordan goes to therapy! She has great therapists - that's their job to know how to teach her. So while other moms watch eagerly during their kids' therapy sessions to see how and what is being done. I gladly relax with a book in the car while the boys sleep. Yes - I am THAT mom!!!

I used to believe that if you had five kids it was easy to fall into them parenting each other. And that that was a bad thing. And I would never do it! Famous last words - they do parent each other but it isn't a bad thing - it is an amazing thing!! Sometimes they need to be reminded that I am the mommy, they are the sibling. But for the most part I am watching incredible relationships develop between them, and an incredible sense of confidence in my older kids. So yes I have become THAT mom!!

I used to think that only a terrible, self-absorbed mother could ever forget to pick up her child from the bus - yesterday I became THAT mother.

But before I became THAT mother I never imagined that I would be scheduling CT scan for one kid and delivering stool samples from another all the in the space of an hour, both for medical issues we can't seem to diagnose or correct. And that that would not be out of the ordinary. I am THAT mother in part because my life has become THAT life!! And that is okay because THAT life includes MY kids!!!

Yesterday April made a comment that we have discovered my limits - and yes I think she is right. I guess five and half kids is where I have reached my ability to keep schedules straight on a day that isn't "normal", to have reached the point of wanting to crawl back in bed after two drs appts and three conferences with all the little ones in tow. By yesterday afternoon I was done with Jordan's defiance, Timothy's screaming and Nathan's whining!

Somedays it is hard not to be frustrated that I have been in toddlerhood for sooooo long - it seems so endless!!! And sometimes hopeless. Developmentally Jordan is about 2-3 years old so I currently care for three toddlers. Have I mentioned I am not really a toddler person to begin with? For the most part Timothy is in the fun stages of toddlerhood - except when he is screaming! And when he is surpassing Jordan developmentally which is hard to see! But I am not a mom who wants her children dependent on me - my goal is to teach independence!!!

One of the benefits of five and half kids (and probably my older age :)) is that I have reached the place that I can laugh at myself for being THAT mom!! :) I am comfortable with who I am as a mom. I have accepted who I am - my house will never be spotless - or even completely picked up, I will be the mom in jeans and a sweatshirt, and as much as I am their mother- my kids and I are a team to get through days like yesterday!! I make mistakes every day and I aologize to my kids when I let them down and at the end of the day I know they know I love them!! I know they know I will be there for them and I love being with them - even after days like yesterday :) When I look at my kids and I think of all we have come through and will still face - I know it is okay that I am THAT mom!!